Domestic violence can come in many forms, including:

PHYSICAL ABUSE: Grabbing, shoving, slapping, hitting, hair pulling, biting, etc.; denying medical care or forcing alcohol and/or drug use.

SEXUAL ABUSE: Coercing or attempting to coerce any sexual contact without consent, e.g., marital rape, forcing sex after physical beating, attacks on sexual parts of the body or treating another in a sexually demeaning manner, forcing the victim to perform sexual acts on another person or via the Internet, or forcing the victim to pose for sexually explicit photographs.

EMOTIONAL ABUSE: Undermining an individual’s sense of self-worth, e.g., constant criticism, belittling one’s abilities, name calling/insults, damaging a partner’s relationship with others; humiliating individual in front of others, getting angry in a way that is frightening. See Emotional Abuse.

PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE: Causing fear by intimidation; threatening to self harm or harm you, people you care about, or pets, destruction of property, stalking or cyberstalking, playing “mind games” to make you doubt your sanity or question memory of events (gaslighting), forcing isolation from others, school, and/or work. Psychological abuse involves the use of verbal and social tactics to control an individual’s thoughts. Often, the abuser uses this as a tactic to break down self-esteem in order to create a psychological dependency.

ECONOMIC ABUSE: Making or attempting to make a person financially dependent, e.g., maintaining total control over financial resources, withholding access to money, forbidding attendance at school or employment. See Financial Abuse.

SEXUAL COERCION & REPRODUCTIVE CONTROL: Sabotaging of birth control efforts by demanding unprotected sex, lying about “pulling out,” hiding or destroying birth control (i.e., flushing pills down the toilet or poking a hole in a condom), preventing individual from getting an abortion or forcing individual to get an abortion. An abuser may also use his/her or the individual’s HIV-positive status or sexual orientation as a means to control. See Abuse Among Those Living With HIV and LGBTQ Victims.

CULTURAL & IDENTITY ABUSE: Threatening to “out” a partner’s sexual orientation or gender identity, participation in S&M or polyamory, HIV status, immigration status, or any other personal information to family, friends, coworkers, landlords, law enforcement, etc. Using an individual’s race, class, age, immigration status, religion, size, physical ability, language, and/or ethnicity against themselves.

The Am I Being Abused? Checklist has additional examples of the types of behavior that can be considered abuse.

Hotlines: National Domestic Violence Hotline, LGBT National Help Center